IC Disease

Please read Part 1 of this series by clicking here. 

I am not a licensed therapist or counselor, so the information I give here is strictly what I have learned from my own experience dealing with relationships and chronic illness.

Communicating with your spouse about sex is important even when there isn’t a chronic illness is involved.  It just becomes that much more crucial when you and your family are affected by an illness like IC Disease.  My husband and I have always had a close, honest relationship so for us to talk about sex and how IC was affecting our sex life was easy for us.  I know it isn’t that simple for all couples, however.

The one thing that I always felt was so important during the times my IC was too severe to have sex was to still be close to my husband.  I would touch him and love him but we wouldn’t go “all the way”.  I would also reassure him that the reason I didn’t want to have sex had nothing to do with him.  I wanted him and loved him just as much as ever, my body just wouldn’t allow it at that particular time.

No matter how bad I felt, I always made sure he felt comfortable and secure.  That was important to me and it still is.  It is common for most people to feel like the chronic illness is only affecting them. But that isn’t so.  When you are sick, your spouse and entire family is affected and regardless of how bad you feel, you still have to consider them and their feelings as well.

Also let your husband know that it is not their fault if you do happen to have sex that the IC flares.  They need to be reassured at that time too that they did not do this to you.  The illness has done this to you. 

Talk and talk a lot.  That is the best advice I can give.

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